Homesick

[japanesebaby]

hey hey! just one more and i'll walk away all
the everything you win turns to nothing today
and i forget when to move when my mouth is this
dry and my eyes are bursting hearts in a blood-
stained sky oh it was sweet it was wild and oh
how we...i trembled stuck in honey honey
cling to me so just one more just one more go
inspire in me the desire in me to never go home

oh just one more and i'll walk away all the
everything you win turns to nothing today so
just one more just one more go inspire in me
the desire in me to never go home


one of my favorite cure lines - maybe THE favorite lines:

inspire in me the desire in me
to never go home

i'd very much like it to be differently and i'd very much like to be able to notice one day that i am finally somehow content with where i am and what i am. but so far, i seem to be never completely at ease anywhere. when i'm at home, in my "regular" life, i feel like i'm just wasting time, like there is some sort of horrible crime in progress, something completely unforgivable. that i should be somewhere else, i should do something else, be something else. and then looking at it from the opposite angle, i don't miss back home when i'm away from there. i don't really know what i should miss or why i should miss it. BUT if i stay too long in someplace else, i start feeling i should be in some third place. so it's like i'm in place A, i seem to miss place B. and when and if i get to the place B, i feel i should in place C.
so these lines always remind of the unability to really be at ease anywhere, at least for a long time. the best times in your life are those when you're moving, changing, when things flow; when you notice that for several days (or better: weeks) you haven't felt the usual tiredness and dull boredom of realizing that you are actually "placed", located somewhere.
maybe it's the frustration of being stuck with yourself, in your body. and just as long as you can forget that, as long as you can forget yourself and not pay attention to who and what you are, you can be happy. but just as soon as your "location" hits you, and regardless of whether it's "mental  location" or "physical location"(!), just as long as it hits you it's game over again, you are back to square one, to start all over again. the feeling never stays - oh, by the way:
"this dream always ends" I said
"this feeling always goes
The time always comes to slip away"
"this wave always breaks" I said
"this sun always sets again
And these flowers will always fade"
"this world always stops" I said
"this wonder always leaves
The time always comes to say goodbye"
"this tide always turns" I said
"this night always falls again
And these flowers will always die"

to me that's about the very same thing.

anyway, this kind of "nameless homesickness", wanting to return someplace where you've never even been: i don't think there's a cure for it, at least not outside yourself. and that's why the lines are so powerful to me. i think there's a "common" way to read these lines and that's an interpretation where you are hoping for someone else, some other person to "save" you, to make you forget. but i do NOT think the lines are powerful because of this - because nobody can "save" you. one person cannot ever really help or "save" another person that way, in any way... that is only an illusion at its best. and since it's only an illusion, if you try it then it's also bound to turn out to be a disappointment in the end. you can only ever hope to help yourself. and even that is very hard, very difficult. but there's no cure, no aid, no help outside yourself, nobody or nothing in this world is evr going to come to your rescue.  you are alone, always were and always will be.
and there is the power in those lines: to inspire that hope - even when it's a futile hope. because that's your only consolation anyway.

[robiola]

homesick:
i'd very much like it to be differently and i'd very much like to be able to notice one day that i am finally somehow content with where i am and what i am.

I'm not actually sure it's in everyone's nature to be able to reach that stage, and I'm not even sure that this inability is an entirely negative thing. For some people contentment equals boredom, they only feel alive when change is happening and unpredictability (is that a word?) is on the horizon.
It's a theme I find recurring often in Robert's lyrics, it's one of the first things that struck me when I started listening to The Cure.
"it's always the same"  "again and again and again"  "is it always like this?" etc. -- the frustration and hopelessness of repetition and sameness.

[japanesebaby]

homesick:
i'd very much like it to be differently and i'd very much like to be able to notice one day that i am finally somehow content with where i am and what i am.

I'm not actually sure it's in everyone's nature to be able to reach that stage, and I'm not even sure that this inability is an entirely negative thing. For some people contentment equals boredom, they only feel alive when change is happening and unpredictability (is that a word?) is on the horizon.
It's a theme I find recurring often in Robert's lyrics, it's one of the first things that struck me when I started listening to The Cure.
"it's always the same"  "again and again and again"  "is it always like this?" etc. -- the frustration and hopelessness of repetition and sameness.

yes i see what you mean. but i think that the problem lies in the fact that since let's say something like 95-99% of your life is bound to be more or less sameness and repetition, then those people who do manage to find happiness in that can be considered somewhat "lucky". at least they have means (or some kind of skill) to escape lots of futile frustration in their lives.

[robiola]

yes i see what you mean. but i think that the problem lies in the fact that since let's say something like 95-99% of your life is bound to be more or less sameness and repetition, then those people who do manage to find happiness in that can be considered somewhat "lucky". at least they have means (or some kind of skill) to escape lots of futile frustration in their lives.

I just wonder how many people actually manage to be happy that way, and how many people just convince themselves that they're okay with it because they have no choice or are too afraid of change. Anyway, maybe we're drifting off topic now.

[melly]

This is a brilliant "conversation"..I actually became a little "agitated" when I read JB's comments...for no other reason than I thought how restless she feels, inside and out...how "unsettled" she appears to be...then Robiolas return comments, her "take", her interpretation of what JB was trying to explain and her own very coherent answers.....I asked JB to make this a topic all of it's own, as I think it's one that many people can join in on, and find very interesting...to relate to lines in a Cure song so strongly..intruiges me, it honestly does...
I guess I am one of the "lucky" ones...I am content and at peace with my inner soul..Oh sure, I get angry and sad at times, that's just part of life...but inside, I can honestly say I am "settled"....
Sooo...please join in..either on this particular conversation, which is really, really good, and it would be great if it could be expanded by others... or create your own....the lines of a Cure song and how you interpret them in regards to your life.. 

[robiola]

You know, after rereading japanesebaby's posts in this discussion, I looked at her icon and was struck by how much the image reminds me of what she was saying... Always reaching for the apple but never quite managing to grab it, so you just keep reaching endlessly. But at least you keep striving for it...
When I first got into The Cure I was going through a phase that was more like standing in front of the fridge waiting for the apple to jump out at you and knowing that it won't, and knowing that reaching for it is useless because you won't be able to touch it and so you don't even try. It's like being only halfway alive. That's why as I was saying earlier Robert's songs really spoke to me -- nobody does hopelessness and quiet desperation like our man Robert.

I crouch in fear and wait
I'll never feel again
If only I could remember
Anything at all

Not just through the lyrics but through the music -- some songs from the Faith period for instance sound like...  being lost in a sea of grey fog that slowly suffocates you and takes your will to live and fight. (Geez Robiola, no wonder you love listening to them.)

[melly]

The line " you the one that looks like christmas" which was being discussed in the "talking about lines" thread has evoked two totally different "interpretations"...personally, I feel that it's relating to someone all bright, happy, all wrapped up with verve.... but I suppose it's how a person relates to christmas? If you despise it, then you could look at that line negatively...or opposite, like me..... I guess a lot of lines are interpreted differently by lots of people, particularly when you can relate it to what's happening in your life at the time...or, indeed, a simple line can bring happy or sad memories back like an avalanche...there are not many artists who are expert at this...Robert being right up there with the "can do"...makes you wonder sometimes just what HE has or is going through?

[robiola]

... I guess a lot of lines are interpreted differently by lots of people, particularly when you can relate it to what's happening in your life at the time...or, indeed, a simple line can bring happy or sad memories back like an avalanche...there are not many artists who are expert at this...Robert being right up there with the "can do"...makes you wonder sometimes just what HE has or is going through?

Well, that's part of the magic, isn't it....The Cure's music and lyrics are so evocative.  We interpret them according to our feelings and experiences. That's why so many people have a strong emotional reaction not only to the music but to the person who wrote it... it's "Oh, he has put into words exactly what I feel, which means he feels the same, we are twin souls destined to be together, if only he knew." I for one, when I was a teenager, was certain that Robert was my soulmate...

[melly]

looks like it's just you and I on this Robiola...which surprises me, as, going by what I have encoutered reading peoples comments throughout the forum, I expected many to come here, talk about what lines they particularly love and just how it "fits in" with their life...ah well..I thought it was good, anyway!!
I had to laugh re your comments about why people may think they and Robert should be "one"...there's nothing wrong with "connecting" to him, that's just a natural feeling...BUT there are some straight out loons who HONESTLY think Mary should be expelled and they take her place...it is indeed, a fine line bewteen passion and obsession (take a look in the "official site..if you dare...there are some "beauties there!!    )...and I'm not talking about teenagers either!! hey, I wanted to marry David Bowie when I was a young un!! 

[sues777]

... I guess a lot of lines are interpreted differently by lots of people, particularly when you can relate it to what's happening in your life at the time...or, indeed, a simple line can bring happy or sad memories back like an avalanche...there are not many artists who are expert at this...Robert being right up there with the "can do"...makes you wonder sometimes just what HE has or is going through?

Well, that's part of the magic, isn't it....The Cure's music and lyrics are so evocative.  We interpret them according to our feelings and experiences. That's why so many people have a strong emotional reaction not only to the music but to the person who wrote it... it's "Oh, he has put into words exactly what I feel, which means he feels the same, we are twin souls destined to be together, if only he knew." I for one, when I was a teenager, was certain that Robert was my soulmate...

Hey ladies, I've actually been thinking about this topic for a few days now. There are so many lines I really strongly identify with...guess that's why I'm still a Curefan after all these years. 

What really strikes me is the "honesty"(?) in Robert's lyrics.  There are so many that completely reflect how I'm feeling or have felt at times, but I wouldn't necessarily voice these feelings to someone for fear of..well, I don''t know exactly, maybe them not understanding?

Anyhoo, I also had a giggle at Robiola's comments about emotional reactions and Robert being "the one" (yep, also guilty of that as a youngster ).  Now though, I find "comfort" in the fact that at least one other person - well, judging by the comments in this forum, loads of people actually - have had the same feelings as me.  So, these feelings aren't wierd or strange or inappropriate, they're actually perfectly natural..I hope that makes sense?

And on that note, I'm off to have more of a think about it and come up with some specifics....

P.S.  Melly - I stay well clear of the forum in the official site these days...waaaay too scary for me 

[melly]

Oh good! someone else is going to join in!! Like I said sues777 there is absolutely nothing wrong in feeling a "closeness" to Robert, through his music and the words...that's why we all "love" him so!! And it is great that so many of us interpret even the same lines differently... I guess one way to look at it, is from when he was so young, to now, people have been privy to Roberts' thoughts, feelings, through his music. How many of us would DARE to do that?
Anyway, looking forward to your next post...


believe me,,,I do not post "over there"...never...ever... 

[japanesebaby]

if talking about people's identification with robert's lyrics, i suppose there are (at least) two kinds of it. you can either identify to his point of view or identify to the object of (some of) his lyrics.
and surely, some people only seem to focus on the latter and seem to think that that's what identifying is about (and that's why we have all the "i love you robert forever and ever please marry me!" sort of loonies).
but this is a narcistic way to identify with the lyrics - or better say, a narcistic misinterpretation of what "identifying" is/should be about. it doesn't really try to "understand" the writer or consider what he/she's saying.
i'm not saying there's something completely wrong with it, but there's very little anything in it, very little to discuss - because a person who identifies like this is focusing on himself/herself, not on what the writer is trying to say.
and especially songs like 'homesick': because there isn't even anything "fancy" or "tempting" in this song, in terms of trying to identify oneself with the object of the lyrics - this isn't 'lovesong' or 'just like heaven'. i'd dare to say that here you MUST set yourself into the position of the writer here, if you want to be able to reflect this song at all. if people focus on identifying with the object of the lyrics here, the lyrics suddenly become totally banal somehow. it's easy to import some kind of rimantic aspects into it, about the difficulty of separation and blahblahblah, if one takes that side. yet i would see it as a misinterpretation. there's nothing romantic in this song.

(should we have a thread for "lyric interpretations in general" instead?)

[melly]

(should we have a thread for "lyric interpretations in general" instead?)

YES!! good idea.... not sure where it should go, so I will leave that decision to you jb, ok?...

[melly]

I see what you are getting at there; but I feel that if a person identifies with the words of Homesick, it may be because that person is feeling just that way.. by listening to what he is saying in the song; which, to me, IS identifying with the writer..not just "OH that's me at the moment"...surely, by thinking that, you are listening, absorbing, what the writer is putting across, his words..that at THAT moment, when the lyrics are sung, you listen, think " I know what he means", therefore, then being able to match it with whatever you may be, or have been through yourself. So, to me, you are identifying with what he is saying, his point of view AND relating them to yourself.  'Romanticism ' is not the only thing people search for in Roberts songs, actually, far from it...the total opposite, I would have thought. Despair, pain and hopelessness is something most can relate to, by hearing what he is saying, understanding it, then having that feeling of " that's how I am, at this very moment". That is why, when going through a bad time, a lot of people WILL play a song from the Cure collection, as not only do they take comfort in the knowledge Robert is singing what they are feeling, they actually understand most of its meaning...

[robiola]

you can either identify to his point of view or identify to the object of (some of) his lyrics.
and surely, some people only seem to focus on the latter and seem to think that that's what identifying is about (and that's why we have all the "i love you robert forever and ever please marry me!" sort of loonies).
but this is a narcistic way to identify with the lyrics - or better say, a narcistic misinterpretation of what "identifying" is/should be about. it doesn't really try to "understand" the writer or consider what he/she's saying.

I find this a rather unforgiving point of view, and I can't entirely agree with it. It's true that there is a more "emotional" way of listening to a song, where you just let the beauty of it "flow" over you without thinking too much, and of course the bits that are going to strike you and take on a particular meaning for you are the ones that have a strong echo of personal truth for you, they will instantly paint a more vivid picture for you. But I wouldn't call it narcissistic or too self-involved, it's just one of the levels at which you can enjoy one of Robert's songs, a more instinctive one. And if you never indulge in it, you are missing part of the experience.
  At other times you can choose a more cerebral approach, in which you "keep you brain plugged in" as we say here, try to view the lyrics as a whole and reflect on possible meanings and on the writer's intent. This is also rewarding, on a different level, and if I didn't think so I wouldn't have majored in English Lit in college! But one thing I learned is that you should never fool yourself into thinking you are being objective, because you will inevitably still be filtering everything through your personal experience, because that's what human beings do. The question "What does the writer mean to say here?" always had many different answers, many of them plausible, only one which felt true for each person. (This is especially true with rather cryptic texts, as Robert's lyrics tend to be at times.) That's why we say we "interpret" a text or poem or song lyrics, we don't decode or decipher them. Maybe if one keeps this in mind, it doesn't all seem so "black and white", "right and not-competely-wrong-but-almost" anymore.
What do you think?