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What's On Your Mind Atm??

Started by PearlThompsonsBloodflowers, January 03, 2018, 22:52:40

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chemicaloverload

Quote from: Ulrich on October 23, 2018, 18:56:53
Quote from: MeltingMan on October 23, 2018, 18:29:39
That means friend-zoned; acting like a friend. Building up faith - building up a "connection" lowers
sexual attraction in her eyes and means entering the friend zone. It can happen to everyone.


Thanks for the perfect explanation, now I understand.
Can happen. Could be worse, friendship & faith is a good thing...


I think it's very cute you didn't know what it meant :) or more so, the terminology

Friendship is the problem though. If you want to be friends with someone that's cool, but problem with men being friendzoned is they don't wanna just be friends...
Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves

Ulrich

Hm, I guess there is no direct translation and my English-speaking friends never used this word.

Quote from: chemicaloverload on October 23, 2018, 19:11:22
Friendship is the problem though. If you want to be friends with someone that's cool, but problem with men being friendzoned is they don't wanna just be friends...


Yeah, well that's probably why MeltingMan considers leaving it "a challenge".
Can't you see I try? Swimming the same deep water as you is hard...

chemicaloverload

Quote from: Ulrich on October 23, 2018, 19:17:17
Hm, I guess there is no direct translation and my English-speaking friends never used this word.

Quote from: chemicaloverload on October 23, 2018, 19:11:22
Friendship is the problem though. If you want to be friends with someone that's cool, but problem with men being friendzoned is they don't wanna just be friends...


Yeah, well that's probably why MeltingMan considers leaving it "a challenge".


There's only one way to leave the friendzone, find a new friend ;)
Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves

Ulrich

Quote from: chemicaloverload on October 23, 2018, 19:25:05
Quote from: Ulrich on October 23, 2018, 19:17:17
Yeah, well that's probably why MeltingMan considers leaving it "a challenge".


There's only one way to leave the friendzone, find a new friend ;)


Hm, that depends in which direction you wanna leave the friend-zone...  :lol:

Btw, anyone wanting to be my friend? You know, I love you all...  :kissing_smiling_eyes:
Can't you see I try? Swimming the same deep water as you is hard...

MeltingMan

Quote from: chemicaloverload on October 23, 2018, 18:40:19
Why you finding it hard to leave the friend zone?


First of all, I wish Ulrich all the best with his new contact. Keep us informed about the ongoing.  ;)

Staying in the friend zone is normal and common, unless you have developed sexual desire for
someone. The latter helped me to get in touch with women anyway - it's a miracle, if you will.

By the way, I haven't followed the thread so far because I'm a "morning-type".

After the date (it wasn't
actually a "date") I had pain in my lower abdomen for about two days if you know what I mean.
But I'm quite sure that I don't love her, and love changes everything - as you know. Only the sexual
desire is massive - a ten on a scale of ten, but I know it can ruin my life if I don't love her.
And love is the icing on the cake, so we are connected as friends, doing our things - living our
lifes and have a cappuccino from time to time. A very common sight in Germany. Just a side note...

The truth is: We know each other for over ten years. She has an adult son from her first marriage,
an ex-husband and an "admirer", so I'm the fourth in a colored carousel. She appreciated my cards,
phone calls and my general attention (that's what she said to me on the phone), but there's nothing
more...from her side. Welcome to the friend zone.  :lol:
Au lieu de chercher Dieu dans les œuvres, nous
nous cherchons nous-mêmes. Notre paresse est
telle que nous préférons de basses impressions
aisées, qui nous diminuent, aux grandioses qui
exigent de l'effort.

Comment on devient artiste, esthétique. p. 235

chemicaloverload

Hahaha I suppose a new friend is parallel and one of her friends, well, thats the nuclear option  :rofl

Aw Ulrich, does this mean you've had enough of me and need new friends already?  :1f62d:



Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves

chemicaloverload

Quote from: MeltingMan on October 24, 2018, 10:29:34
Quote from: chemicaloverload on October 23, 2018, 18:40:19
Why you finding it hard to leave the friend zone?


First of all, I wish Ulrich all the best with his new contact. Keep us informed about the ongoing.  ;)

Staying in the friend zone is normal and common, unless you have developed sexual desire for
someone. The latter helped me to get in touch with woman anyway - it's a miracle, if you will.

By the way, I haven't followed the thread because I'm a "morning-type".

After the date (it wasn't
actually a "date") I had pain in my lower abdomen for about two days if you know what I mean.
But I'm quite sure that I don't love her, and love changes everything - as you know. Only the sexual
desire is massive - a ten on a scale of ten, but I know it can ruin my life if I don't love her.
And love is the icing on the cake, so we are connected as friends, doing our things - living our
lifes and have a cappuccino from time to time. A very common sight in Germany. Just a side note...

The truth is: We know each other for over ten years. She has an adult son from her first marriage,
an ex-husband and an "admirer", so I'm the fourth in a colored carousel. She appreciated my cards,
phone calls and my general attention (that's what she said to me on the phone), but there's nothing
more...from her side. Welcome to the friend zone.  :lol:


Hmmm MM, you sure this isn't just a friends with benefits type thing? ;) Why would it have to ruin your life? Can you not just have fun without the emotional bit?

Why not appreciate it for what it is without trying to label it. Ride it out. The good thing about carousels is when someone gets off, another gets on  :lol:

Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves

MeltingMan

 Well, there's nothing I can do in the moment. She pulled a red line and someone else
rides it out, possibly. She belongs to a sect and when she opens her mouth you can imagine
what comes out. That alone shakes me off. I have a different background and she knows it.
We can perhaps talk about it, but I suppose the "fun" level with her is lower than it really is.
Au lieu de chercher Dieu dans les œuvres, nous
nous cherchons nous-mêmes. Notre paresse est
telle que nous préférons de basses impressions
aisées, qui nous diminuent, aux grandioses qui
exigent de l'effort.

Comment on devient artiste, esthétique. p. 235

Ulrich

Quote from: MeltingMan on October 24, 2018, 10:29:34
First of all, I wish Ulrich all the best with his new contact. Keep us informed about the ongoing.  ;)


Oh, thank you, that's so kind of you. I'm glad if anyone's interested, because I need to tell someone when my heart (& head) is full of excitement...
So it's good we have this topic here for more "private" discussions.

She sent me a sweet text message in reply to mine.  :happy

And btw, no problem at which time you follow the thread, some of us live in different time zones. I'm just looking in when I find the time (sometimes during work, sometimes after).

Quote from: MeltingMan on October 24, 2018, 10:29:34
...we are connected as friends, doing our things - living our
lifes and have a cappuccino from time to time. A very common sight in Germany.


Ah yes, I think I know this sight.
Not just seeing other people do this, but from my own perspective, too. ;)

Quote from: MeltingMan on October 24, 2018, 10:29:34
... I'm the fourth in a colored carousel. She appreciated my cards, phone calls and my general attention (that's what she said to me on the phone), but there's nothing more...


Thanks, that explains a lot. Just make sure she won't ever read this (sometimes I tend to forget this is a public forum after all)!
Can't you see I try? Swimming the same deep water as you is hard...

Ulrich

Quote from: MeltingMan on October 24, 2018, 11:22:45
She pulled a red line ...


Oh well, you'll have to accept that (for the moment at least).
The other stuff (a religious thing?) does not sound too good.

The girl I met is a little "active" in a church, but she's "down to earth" and seems like a very "normal" person to me (so far) - and that's good.

Quote from: chemicaloverload on October 24, 2018, 10:32:02
Aw Ulrich, does this mean you've had enough of me and need new friends already?  :1f62d:


Nooo, the more the merrier. When I said "I love you all" that included you of course.  :kissing_closed_eyes:
Can't you see I try? Swimming the same deep water as you is hard...

chemicaloverload

Well, I wish you well with what ever you end up doing MM. You seem to have a good grasp on the situation and all you can do is try to look after yourself in the process, whatever the outcome.

Ulrich, it's nice to see you happy :) and it's even better that you wish to share it. Long may it continue. As for new friends, I'm glad your not ready to dispose of me quite yet :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: Who would amuse you if you did?
Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves

Ulrich

Quote from: chemicaloverload on October 24, 2018, 12:00:33
As for new friends, I'm glad your not ready to dispose of me quite yet :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: Who would amuse you if you did?


Very true!  :D

There are some people/friends I don't see much anymore - some are far away, some I don't want to see too often, but I hardly ever said to anyone: "I never wanna see you again". (Someone would have to cross several red lines to make me say that...)
Can't you see I try? Swimming the same deep water as you is hard...

word_on_a_wing

Just watching a bit of The Cure on my tv in the background and noticed this has 3.1 million views! Wow!! 

https://youtu.be/ckdHyuPZY8s

That's kind of crazy right ? Maybe it's just hard for my mind to wrap itself around the fact that something/someone who feels so personal to me ...is experienced like this by 3.1 million others 😮

Pretty cool though ...perhaps so many minds listening/watching is imparting interesting vibrations into the collective consciousness ✨
"Where the flesh meets the spirit world,
Where the traffic is thin..."

chemicaloverload

A cold cider to numb a busy day spent in front of a computer.

The moon is so big and bright tonight, Halloween is near.
Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves

Ulrich

The 2nd date (dinner) was wonderful too... three hours of bliss. She's so down-to-earth and nice, we could've talked for several hours more... soon I will start looking towards the next rendezvous.  :heart-eyes
Can't you see I try? Swimming the same deep water as you is hard...